subject bakura
by baka-basher
Summary: someone is studing "earthlings" and thep pick bakura as their subject warning: some sexual and yaoi hints
1. Default Chapter

Yami of doom: hello

Yami of darkness (and other creepy things): finger

Bakura: this word has been edited

Malik: cackling maniacally

Marik: laughing in a even more psycho way

Seto: gives his every-one-else-in-the-world-is-an-idiot look

Yami: holier-then-thou look

Yami of doom: my happy family gets hit with random objects including bakura's beer cans, the millennium puzzle, seto's metal briefcase, malik's motorcycle, the millennium rod, and rabid rabbit OW THAT HURTS!!!!! screams (runs in circles with a rabid rabbit on her head)

DISCLAIMER: YAMI OF DOOM OWNS YU-GI-OH

Yami of doom: (where's the rabbit?)

Bakura: WHAT THE HELL?!

Yami of doom: - lets start the st-

Disclaimer: HEY WHERE'S MY 2O BUCKS!

Seto: I'll pay you triple that amount if you say she doesn't own us

Disclaimer: yami of doom doesn't own yu-gi-oh

Yami of doom: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO (dramatic pose)

* * *

**LOG 1010 HAVE FINISHED OBSERVATION OF SUBJECT**WELCOME! TO OUR OBSERVATION OF EARTH _In here I shall take you on a trip inside our subject_

ALBINO

Shows bakura smoking

_Our first subject is an earthling we shall call albino_

_Now we have found out that earthling's insides are extremely interesting_

_We have found out the best way to get inside this creature is though his mouth _

__Shows bakura insulting random people, eating Popsicles and laughing maniacally at some poor saps misfortune

_So we have set a distraction to open his mouth_

Shows a lone Popsicle lying on the ground

_Judging by this earthlings diet of flavored ice which they call "Popsicles", small cylinders called "camels" and a strange bitter liquid by the name of "booze" _

_We are assuming this "tutee fruity Popsicle" shall get our subjects attention _

Bakura sees the Popsicle and automatically pops it into his mouth

_our camera is attached to the Popsicles_

Inside bakura's mouth

_As you can see our subject is obviously a mutant judging by the fact that he has fangs (_I'm not surprised )

_After traveling down the esophagus we come to the stomach _(I'm sort of going to random parts of the body)

shows bakura's stomach

_we toke a sample to find out what our subject has digested over the day and we found_

_10 Popsicles_

_20 packs of booze_

_30 cartons of camels _

_and strange unidentified meat _

bakura eating a rat burger

_now we travel to the lungs _

_Earthling's lungs are very strange_

shows bakura's lungs

_earthling lungs are covered in a hard black tar like substance that comes from smoking "camels"_

_the strange thing is that with the earthlings organs so messed up we only expected our subject to live 3 hours but we came up with this footage_

bakura beating up Joey

bakura jumping over fences chasing after Joey for stealing his cigarettes

bakura and malik fighting

bakura smacking a zoned out malik who was in an r rated daydream involving whip cream , chocolate , Carmel , bakura , and other toppings

bakura being chased by a very mad shadi

bakura slugging Joey again

bakura being chased by malik on his motorcycle

_in conclusion earthlings are an extremely strange and mysterious species and more study is needed_

_join us next time as we actually spend a week with our subject and study the habits of the earthlings _

_p.s. enclosed are some pictures of our subject_

* * *

yami of doom: - I'm going to make sequel to this lets just say bakura gets rather mad at the end and it evolves the question "Why do earthlings like Popsicles?" "Does it have any thing to do with finding a mate? 


	2. day 1 it's very short!

Yami of doom: (completely oblivious)

Baka-basher: want a cookie doom?

Doom: - thank you

Yami of darkness: (hiding in the shadows thinking of ways to get back at Baka-basher.

Disclaimer: doom doesn't own anything

* * *

**Log 24124 MISSION 2 COMPLETE**Welcome back! Here we will study the habits of the earthlings 

_**(7:30)**_

Bakura & malik (asleep)

**_(9:30)_**

Bakura & malik (still asleep)

_**(10:30)**_

Bakura & malik: (asleep)

**_(12:30)_**

Isis screaming at her brother and bakura to get up

Bakura and malik still asleep

**_(2:30)_**

Bakura and malik still asleep

Isis calling 9-1-1

**_(3:30)_**

**__**Bakura and malik still asleep

Doctors announcing bakura and malik "brain dead"

**_(4:30)_**

Joey, Honda, anzu and yami skipping in joy

Bakura and malik still asleep

**_(5:30)_**

Joey waves a Popsicle in front of bakura's face before eating it

Bakura stops Popsicle right before Joey eats it which wakes malik

**_(6:30)_**

Bakura and malik watch as a furious yami chases Joey around the room

_**(7:30)**_

Bakura begins eating Popsicles in'till malik tackles him and they...um well we're not sure

_**(8:30 and beond)**_

**_Albino spent the rest of the night with his mate doing strange things those earthlings called "getting laid" we had foottage but some earthlings from a place called "fan fiction .net" toke it away_******

Doom: we're going to have to keep make this a pg-13 fic just because of****this chapter

Don't worry this is only the second in the line of subject bakura

Their will also be subject malik and subject yami and other goodie's

Sorry it's so short


End file.
